Well, I didn’t expect THAT

Yesterday was my 6ish week ultrasound. We had mentally been trying to prepare for all possible scenarios. Even though my betas were good, the ultrasound is just so much more important. It was at 4:15 yesterday so I had to spend the ENTIRE day dreaming up every possible scenario. Luckily I had an acupuncture appointment over lunch so that helped calm me a little bit. Regardless around 3pm I started to lose it again. I honestly thought I had prepared for every scenario – 

  • Ectopic Pregnancy 
  • A gestational sac but no yolk or fetal pole (miscarriage)
  • A gestational sac with a yolk (ultrasound was too early)
  • A goofy looking gestational sac with a yolk (eventual miscarriage)
  • A gestational sac, yolk, and fetal pole with no heartbeat (unknown)
  • A gestational sac, yolk, and fetal pole with a crappy heartbeat (eventual miscarriage)
  • A gestational sac, yolk, and fetal pole with so-so heartbeat (very nervous/anxious me)
  • A gestational sac, yolk, and fetal pole with strong heartbeat (possible successful pregnancy)

So I was prepared, right? WRONG, so, so wrong. The doctor comes in with a resident. The resident initially does the ultrasound, seeing a perfectly round gestational sac and a yolk. The doctor thought she could see where the fetal pole might be, but that it was too early and that I was only 5.5 weeks as I suspected. But the doctor wanted to give it a try so she took over for the resident. Here’s how it went

Doctor – Oh, there looks to be a second yolk sac

Me – What does that mean?

Doctor – Twins

Husband – Like….identical twins?

Doctor  – Yes!

Me – Could it mean anything else?

Doctor – Nope!

Ummm yeah….ok! Neither of us have identical twins in our families and if you’ll recall this was a NON MEDICATED CYCLE! WTF! Just when I thought I couldn’t be any more surprised than last week. Besides being even more shocked than we already were, we are overall happy that we could have two babies. I am of course terrified of all the increased risk (preterm labor, preeclampsia, gestational diabetes, etc etc etc). But all of those concerns are a long way off still, we have other things to worry about now (will we see two hearbeats next week?).

So, I think I will update you guys one more time next week after the next ultrasound and then I’ll go into the RPL shadows of pregnancy. Thank you so much for all of your prayers and thoughts, they are clearly working so far!

What’s in a number?

So I’m going back for another beta today. I know you technically should wait two days, but we’re out of town tomorrow. Plus, my clinic hasn’t even called me back to tell me what to do now that we got the first beta back. Gee thanks guys. The only reason I know what the first beta number was is because I got it drawn through the hospital rather than my clinic so I was able to check the results online. 

I know they say the doubling of the HCG is more important than the actual number itself. Which I do agree with, but when I compare my numbers to my last pregnancy, they just seem so low. Granted that pregnancy ended in a miscarriage, so I guess I shouldn’t go by that. After some extensive googling I’ve decided I will be semi-sorta-kinda-optimistic that I could STILL be pregnant if my number has increased by 25% since yesterday.

The number we’re hoping for? 3800. If it’s 3800 or higher, I’ll hang on to some hope. If its between 3300-3800 I’ll be stuck in ambiguity land. And if its the same or lower than yesterdays 3140, I’ll know it’s time to call it. 

Still can’t believe I was even pregnant to begin with. Oh the irony. My husband is texting me the results (hopefully he’ll be feverishly hitting the refresh button) while I am hopefully taking my mind off all this at dinner and a play with my mom and sister (mom has no idea about any of this, sister does). As soon as I get home, I’ll post a quick update.